now and ever more

each journey begins with one step . . . a baby step

8 weeks . . . May 30, 2012

Filed under: Pregnancy — nowandevermore @ 5:42 PM
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Reached the 8 week mark today.  Only 7 months to go. 🙂  Still seems so far away.

Nausea update:  Been trying my hardest to not take anything for the nausea.  So that basically means that I have to eat something every hour.  Even if it is just a bite or two of something.  Been doing pretty well with that.  A single-serve greek yogurt (with fruit) or an apple or thanks to a friend who mentioned it in one of her comments a while back, Cheetos.  If I have something “bad” I always make sure to eat something good to balance it out.  Isn’t that how you do it?  Kind of like ordering a big mac and a diet coke.  LOL

And as far as the blockage issue . . . I think it has been solved by not taking any Zofran.  You have no idea how relieved I am knowing that things are moving along as they should.  I still take Colace at night and I might for some time.  But it is safe and much better than the alternative.


I had a question for those of you who have been pregnant or are currently pregnant.  Last night and more so today I have been experiencing some pain.  It isn’t really like cramping pain but it feels like some muscle pain in my lower abdomen, below the belly button but on the sides; left and right.  I was wondering if this is what they call round ligament pain.  From the things I have read, this mostly shows up in the 2nd and 3rd trimester, but I think you can get this in the 1st as well.  Any thoughts on this?

Other than that, the only pain I have is from the stress I went through Sunday.  I think part of my lower back is out.  I get a shooting pain down my right buttock.  Feels like I need to pop my lower back or my hip might be out.  Is it safe to visit a chiropractor?  I guess I could Dr. Google, but curious what you all think.  I will ask at my appointment on Friday.  Hoping it kind of corrects itself.


Did a little work in my flower garden today.  Well, there are no flowers yet, but hoping to get to that Friday.  I dug out some of the weeds and put some new garden soil in.  The ground was so hard I had to water it a bit to loosen the dirt around the weeds.  Doing that little bit of work, really took it out of me.  It is supposed to rain here tomorrow, so I am counting on that to make the soil easier to work with.  I will then get some flowers and hopefully plant them Friday.  We are actually having some cool weather for the next few days so I hope to take advantage of it.  Then once I get that done I will work on the vegetable garden.

Thanks for reading.


sunday at the ER . . . May 28, 2012

Filed under: Pregnancy — nowandevermore @ 10:29 AM
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The title says it all.  But let me start at the beginning.  Warning: TMI post today

As you know I have been having issues with being “blocked up.”  Sunday it got even worse.  I tried about 3 times in the morning to go and nothing would come out.  I could feel it right there and it would not budge.  The past 2 nights I had taken 3 Colace pills and they did nothing for me.  The after 2 times of trying I decided to try another Fleet Enema.  It was painful and still nothing would move.  At this point I told hubby that I needed to go to the ER.  I was in so much pain the entire ride over.  We walk in and the lady that checks you in had me sit in a wheelchair, which I had to do sideways because of the pain.  There were people waiting in the ER waiting room and I just prayed I would not have to wait that long.  They had 2 Triage rooms where you answer questions about your condition and then they determine your place in line I guess based on severity of your symptoms, etc.  They were both full, but once the lady was done in Triage Room 2 I was wheeled in.  I answered the questions through the pain and told her on a scale of 1-10 I was at a 10.  After that I was wheeled to an ER room and given a gown and told to get on the gurney.  I waited for almost 20-30 minutes, I think, for someone to come in to see me.  All the while I was doing all I could not to pass out and scream from the pain.

At this time I was also having trouble peeing.  So the first thing I got was a catheter.  I had this done one other time and it was pretty quickly put in.  However, the nurse was having trouble and talk about pain!  She must have tried about 5 times before another nurse got it in.  All the while they were telling me to relax.  Really???  How in the hell am I supposed to relax when I am in this much pain already and you are causing more.

So once that was done I got an IV and some pain medication.  The pain meds did not really relieve that much pain, it just made me feel like I was going to pass out.  Then the doctor came in and I told him my issue and of course he had to see for himself.  So in went the finger and yes he concurred that I had a blockage right at the opening.  Now comes the part I will NEVER forget!!!  And sorry if this grosses anyone out.  But he had to stick his finger back in and dig out the part that was impacted.  The pain was unbearable!  He actually told me to try to be more quiet with my moans of pain.  Excuse me!  So he was able to clean out some and then let me rest.  They brought in a portable toilet for me to sit on and see if I could pass some on my own.  I welcomed the opportunity.  And thankfully I was able to.  I felt a LOT of relief.  Such a difference over the past few days.

I got back into the gurney and rested some more.  They then moved me to another room in the ER, this one had a private bathroom.  The nurse removed the catheter and then asked me if I wanted to try an enema at the hospital or one at home.  I said I would try one there since I wanted to make sure everything was ok.  That was still painful, but less painful than what the doc did to me.   I still felt like I might have a little blockage so the doctor came back in and checked.  He could not feel anything so no more torture treatment.  Whew!  I asked if I was going to get an ultrasound to check on the baby.  He said it was up to me and I said yes!

So another nurse brought in 2 cups of water, about 24 ounces each and said drink up.  I was confused and told her I thought I was getting a trans-vaginal one and she said she was told to bring me water.  Not helpful.   So about an hour later my bladder was full and they wheeled me down to the ultrasound room.  The technician did a regular u/s which is why I needed a full bladder to keep it out-of-the-way.  I asked if she could tell me if everything looked ok and her answer . . . we aren’t allowed to give results.  I started crying.  I knew my body had been in so much pain and trauma the last few days and my main concern was the baby.

Once she was done with that she said she wanted to do a trans-vaginal one as well, so I had to empty my bladder.  Now mind you I had had the catheter in and had the nurse known that I was having the u/s she would have left it in, but alas it was taken out.  So because of the trouble she had getting it in, in the first place, I now had some pain when I peed.  I tried my best to empty as much of the bladder that I could and got up on the table.  Then the technician tells me to insert the probe myself.  WHAT???  I had never done that before.  She said they ask the patient so it isn’t painful for them.   ok…this was new.  So I inserted it and she said my bladder was still too full!  UGH!!!  Out with the probe and back to the bathroom.  Back on the table, insert the probe and finally the bladder was empty enough.

So I asked her again.  “Can you at least tell me if you see a heartbeat?”  And again she says, “we are not allowed to give results.”  I started crying again.  I could not believe it.  She kept probing around for a long time and clicking buttons and then I heard  about a second of what sounded like a heartbeat.  I prayed that is what it was.  I do know that when I had the u/s done after the ovarian cyst ruptured there is a similar sound when they check blood flow.  So I wasn’t sure what it was, but prayed it was the heartbeat.

So after that I was wheeled back to my room in the ER and was left to wait for the results.  A half hour passed and nothing.  10 more minutes and nothing and I was being wheeled out into the hall.  Yes they needed to room for another patient and I had to now be in the hall.  About 20 minutes later, the nurse came up and said that I was being discharged.  I was still waiting on the doctor for the results, but asked her if everything was ok with the baby and she said yes.  What a relief and then more tears!  So she took the IVF out and the doc came over and said everything looked good.  The baby was measuring 7 weeks 2 days.  I told him that on Friday it was 7 weeks, 3 days and he said that was ok.  Then the more I thought about it, I realized that the hospital’s equipment was probably better than what my doctor’s office has as far as clarity and also the hospital has u/s technicians and the doc’s office has the nurse do the test.  So there was probably just a minor error on the measurement.  Still that is only 2 days behind where I am so I know that is ok.

So after that I got dressed and I was on my way home.  I feel so much better.  I called the nurse on call last night and pretty much told her I would not take Zofran again and that I needed a new prescription for something that will NOT constipate me.  About an hour later, she called back and the doctor prescribed me Phenergan Suppositories for nausea.  I am headed out shortly to get them.   I haven’t taken anything since yesterday morning and am starting to feel some nausea again.  I really hope that this helps and does not cause any issues and that the nausea goes away soon!  And I think I pulled some back muscles on the right side from holding on the bars on the side of the gurney when the doctor was doing his thing.  Talk about a death grip!

Hope everyone is having a great Monday! 🙂

Thanks for reading.


latest u/s . . . May 25, 2012

Today was our 3rd official ultrasound (I had 2 unofficial ones because of the bleeding scares).

The baby is measuring 7 weeks 3 days.  Technically I am 7 weeks 2 days, so that sounds great!  The heartbeat was 147bpm.  Even better!  Picture isn’t that clear but the heartbeat sure sounded wonderful!  That dark spot above the sac could be another one of those bleeding spots.  But (knock on wood) I haven’t bled since Tuesday night!


I go back next Friday for another ultrasound and then the following week I will have another one with the nurse practitioner.  I will be turned over to my OB around 10-12 weeks.  We shall see.  Then I probably won’t get to see the baby that often. Who knows.  From what I have read all doctors are different.


In other news . . . now this is where things get a little TMI.  But this is what I am experiencing with my pregnancy as do a lot of women, so I am going to share.

I have been constipated.  That is something that can happen during pregnancy.  There are a lot of different things to try to do to alleviate this issue.  Eat more fiber, take Colace, drink lots of water, etc.  However, a side effect of the Zofran (anti-nausea med) is also constipation.  And I think it has caused me to have a little more issues.

So yesterday I did a little “Dr. Google” and decided to call and talk to the doctor.  Now There are other options besides Zofran out there, but I have Crohn’s Disease.  I have been in remission for over 15 years, but it is something I will always have.  So I always have to be careful with certain foods I eat and the medicine I take.  The nurse practitioner gave me the Zofran because it would be easier on my system than other meds (they could cause diarrhea). And FYI, with having Crohn’s it is not unusual for me to go 2-3 times a day.  That was my norm.

So I called to ask about using a Fleet Enema.  I have been taking the Colace (and will still take it) but it hasn’t been working the past couple of days.  I was given the green light.  I have used these before, so I knew what to expect although it had been several years.  I did get some relief but I don’t think I “kept it in” long enough to fully “clean me out.”  So today I am still a little miserable.  So after the ultrasound I called and asked about the Fleet Glycerine Suppositories.  I was told those are also safe to use so lucky me gets to try that later. I also think these are a bit easier on the system than the enema.

My first and foremost concern is for this baby.  But I also know that being as uncomfortable as I am is not good for me or the baby.  So as long as I am told by the doc or NP that it is ok, I will do it.

Hope that didn’t make too many of you uncomfortable reading about it.

Hope you all have a wonderful Memorial Day Weekend, for those that celebrate it and those that don’t have a great weekend!

Thanks for reading.


7 weeks . . . May 23, 2012

Filed under: Pregnancy — nowandevermore @ 1:58 PM
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Today I am 7 weeks.  Still very early, but moving along.  Anxiously awaiting our next ultrasound appointment this Friday!

After the panic on Monday, I spotted on and off the rest of that day and throughout the night.  Then nothing on Tuesday until right before bed.  More bleeding but not quite as heavy as the day before.  Then nothing so far today.  I still don’t like seeing the red, but I am not quite as scared as I had been.  There is no cramping or clots that come with it, so as long as it stays that way I am ok.  And after dealing with the bleeding before bed I saw this posted on FB by a friend and thought it was perfect for the moment.

I also learned a bit about morning sickness.  I was always under the impression that morning sickness meant that you were throwing up.  I was reading in one of the new books I got (more on that later) that “morning sickness refers to the nausea (with or without vomiting) that occurs during pregnancy.”  So all this time I thought I was just experiencing nausea but in fact it was full-blown morning sickness.  And I have been having it ALL day long.  It was getting pretty bad for me.  Again, no vomiting, but it was getting to the point where I could not function.  I did not want to eat, all I wanted to do was stay in bed.

I finally broke down and called the nurse yesterday.  I was going to wait until Friday when we go for our appointment but I thought, why put myself through that.  The nurse practitioner actually called me back and she agreed to prescribe me Zofran.  She warned me that it is an expensive medicine ( even the generics) and that insurance might only give me a 10 day prescription with my copay.  But she said if it got to be too much money, that she would call in something else.  So I called the pharmacy a couple of hours later and was told it would be ready soon.  I actually got a generic (Ondansetron) and for a one month supply (60 pills) it was only $13.  I was thrilled!!!

And more importantly, it is working!!!  I took one about 4:30pm last night after I picked it up and did feel better, but I figured the true test would be today.  I woke up and started feeling nauseated.  I took a pill and ate a couple of crackers.  After that I ate breakfast and have eaten lunch and I am pleased to report I still feel ok!  Typically after eating something about 30 min to an hour later the nausea returned.  Yesterday it actually stayed through me eating lunch and got worse after which is why I decided to call.

I can actually feel like I can function.  I still need to take things relatively easy because of the bleeding, but I feel so much better!


So last Saturday I decided to finally order a couple of books.  I got them Monday and have started to read this one and really like it.

Image Detail

I was originally thinking of getting “What to Expect When You Are Expecting” but after reading the reviews on this one, it was a better choice for me.

I also got another book on eating for pregnancy and a pregnancy journal.  I haven’t opened those yet, but will tell you all about them when I do.


One of the other things I have been dealing with lately is bloating!  Yes, part of it is my fault.  Because of the morning sickness I have not been eating as well as I should be.  The nurse practitioner told me after I expressed concern about nutrients for the baby, that as long as I was taking my prenatal vitamin, the baby was getting enough.  But once I get to the 2nd and 3rd trimester that is when I need to really watch and make sure I am eating better.  So I did feel better about that.  I know it is not a license to eat badly, but when you are trying to figure out what to eat and Chick-Fil-A or a McDonald’s burger is the only thing that sounds good, I won’t feel quite so badly about it.

So back to the bloating.  Feels worse after I eat, but it is also because I have been a little “stopped-up” if you get my meaning.  It isn’t completely, but I can definitely tell it has slowed down!  I have been trying to drink a lot of water and have taken Colace to help move things along.  Hopefully that will start working soon.

As a result of the bloating, some of my clothes that I have been wearing around the house have started to feel uncomfortable.  Probably more so with the nausea.  But the elastic in the pants were feeling tight.  So I thought to myself, I know it is still early, but maybe I can try a cheap pair of maternity pants or something.  I checked out Wal-mart online and saw that they had maternity clothes that were pretty inexpensive and since it was so early, I don’t mind spending $10-15 now for a little more comfort, knowing that I might need to buy more things later.

So I decided to go and check out the selection at the store.  I like to try things on, especially pants and I didn’t want to have to wait a few days for it to be delivered.  We have a Super Wal-mart, so I figured the selection might be different from online, but I should be able to find something.  I got there and started looking around.  After not finding anything I asked one of the employees where the maternity section was and she said they don’t have one.  WHAT????  I could not believe it!  I guess they must figure pregnant women don’t shop there for clothing.  I was thoroughly disgusted.  And I really didn’t feel like going to Target or Kohl’s as I was starting to get hungry.  Yes, hunger, NOT nausea!  WOO HOO!


So that has been my day so far.  I stopped at Taco Bell on the way home.  I haven’t had that in months and it was pretty good.  Although I come to find out they don’t have the Chilli Cheese Burrito anymore.  That has, in the past, had a way of getting things to move along, but alas it is no longer.  The crunchy tacos were pretty good though.

Hope everyone is having a great day!

Thanks for reading!


panic monday . . . May 21, 2012

Filed under: Pregnancy — nowandevermore @ 11:50 AM
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So the bleeding had stopped Friday and I had no bleeding Saturday or Sunday.  Then I woke up this morning to use the bathroom and it was back!  More than I had on Friday.  So we headed back to the RE’s office and waited our turn for the u/s.

Again, we saw that beautiful heartbeat and heard it also.  The baby also looked like it had grown and the heartbeat was a wonderful 132bpm.  I heaved a big sign of relief and proceeded to ask the nurse what is going on.

Here is a picture of the ultrasound.

This shows the baby in the black gestational sac.  Above that sac you will notice a darker area.  That is what I am most likely bleeding from.  Something that can happen during the first trimester in some pregnancies.  Lucky me! (Can you sense the sarcasm?)

So I was told to take it easy for a few days.  Just praying that this is the end of it and I don’t have it anymore during the pregnancy.  But at least know I know a bit better what to look for.  It is bleeding only.  No cramping and no clots. If I were to experience the latter then I would definitely be more worried.  But at least I won’t be running back and forth all the time.  Now I wait patiently for my regular appointment on Friday.

Thanks for reading.


this is not going to be easy . . . May 18, 2012

Filed under: Pregnancy — nowandevermore @ 2:41 PM
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OK, I never thought it would be.  I am 40 and thus this is considered a high-risk pregnancy.  It took us 3 years to get pregnant, again not easy.

I felt some relief this morning after seeing and hearing that heartbeat.  But then that changed about 12:45pm.  I was sitting at my desk (home-office) and felt a gush.  Now those of you on Endometrin might feel some discharge from time to time, but this was different.  I got up and went to the bathroom and there was blood.  More trickled out and it was bright red.  Spotting is OK if it is pink or brown, but not red.  My heart was starting to break, but I tried to remain positive.

I called and spoke to the nurse that I saw this morning and she told me to come back.  Thankfully they are only 10 minutes away.  We got there and she got me back to the u/s room and put the probe in and there it was.  That beautiful heartbeat.  I cried from relief!  Everything looked great, still!

She said that the u/s can sometimes cause irritation in the cervix or sometimes there is blood that comes from the uterus in spots.  She said she might have seen something.  But everything looks good with the baby.

So I am to take things easy this weekend and keep and eye on things (I have been doing that every time I go to the bathroom since I found out I was pregnant).

I already called my mom this morning to give her the news, but I don’t think I will tell her about this.  No need to have her worry.  I know she will, to the point of going crazy.  This has been quite a day!

Oh and I remembered to ask what the baby was measuring.  6 weeks 2 days.  So right on schedule!!!  Whew!!!

Thanks for reading.


we have a heartbeat . . .

Filed under: Pregnancy — nowandevermore @ 11:20 AM
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Today we had a pretty long wait.  But finally it was our turn.  We got the “good room”.  This one has a monitor up in the corner so we can have a better look at the ultrasound.  I had a split second where I got a little scared.  The nurse inserted the probe and we saw the gestational sac and it was solid black.  Then she moved it around and there was our baby!  She said she saw the heartbeat too!  JOY!!

She changed the screen over and there is was on the screen and also in our ears.  It was so beautiful!  123bpm.

Here is the baby…what a cutie huh? 🙂

And here is the heartbeat!

We go back next Friday and I think I may take our video camera to see if I can record the sound.  Of course my hubby being the jokester that is he, said “I don’t think that will fit up there.”  🙂

Thanks for reading!