now and ever more

each journey begins with one step . . . a baby step

question and other stuff . . . March 20, 2012

So I have mentioned that I am on a lot.  I get a daily email listing new discussion questions/topics.  Yesterday I saw one that I thought was interesting and I thought I would bring it up here and ask your opinions.

So as someone who struggles with fertility, it is always tough to see babies and little kids; whether at the store, at the park, etc.  One of the toughest places (in my opinion) is at the doctor’s office, more specifically the RE’s office.  I understand that the women who bring their children in are most likely one of the “success stories.”  However, it is still difficult.  I would say that was the consensus of the women who posted on the topic I read yesterday.  The woman who started the topic, posed a question as to how others felt when kids were present.  She had a child and was experiencing secondary infertility (no problem conceiving first child but now all of a sudden there is a problem with conceiving subsequent children).  There were days when she could not get a sitter and just could not reschedule her appointment to a day when she could get a sitter.

Here is how I feel about the issue.  I understand, if you just can’t find a sitter.  If I had a child, I would not just call someone or someplace and drop my kid off there because I was desperate.  However, as someone currently dealing with fertility issues, I would honestly say, if I did have a child and needed to visit an RE I would do whatever was in my power to find a sitter simply because I know how it feels on the “other side.”  Thankfully when I had to go in for my subsequent betas while going through the miscarriage I did not have to be subjected to someone bringing their child in.  That would have been so hard and I am sure I would have just busted out in tears.  But at the same time, sometimes things do not work out the way we want them to and if you can’t get a sitter, well, you have to do what you have to do.

I did find out some interesting things while reading the entire discussion.  There are actually RE’s offices that have a “no child” policy.  They even make you sign a paper indicating that you are aware of it.  And at the same time they do not have pictures of babies posted about.  The office I go to does not have such a policy and they do have a “brag board” as I will call it, showing pictures of their success stories.  Yes there are times it is difficult to look at, but then there are times when I can envision sending them a photo of our little miracle.

I cannot imagine how difficult it would be for someone who has a child and cannot find a sitter to be able to schedule procedures at the offices with a no child policy.  But I guess if you know that going in, you can decide to work with it or find another RE to see.  Likewise, if you know that they do allow children, you have the option of staying there or going to an RE who does not.  Life is full of choices.  Some are easy and some are more difficult.

So my advice would be if you are shopping around for an RE and you think that might be an issue for you, ask if they have a no child policy.  If they don’t and you still decide to go there, be prepared.  It might not be easy, but remember we are strong.  God does not give us anything we can’t handle.  Not always easy to remember, but I believe it to be true.

And for those with children I would also like to offer a piece of advice and I hope I don’t offend.  This is just my opinion as it is my blog. 🙂  If you must take your child to the RE’s office, try to do so in a manner that is the least disruptive.  Try to remember that there are women there who have never been pregnant or may be going through a loss.  Try not to draw a ton of attention to your child.  Yes I know children are unpredictable or they may even be fussy, it happens.  But do the best you can.  I was waiting one day and a lady came in with her 2 or 3-year-old and proceeded to whip out her iPad and play a child’s movie on it to occupy the child.  The sound was loud and disruptive.  It basically made the waiting room feel like it was a child’s play room.  Or one lady let her child walk all about, looking at this and that.  Again, I know kids are kids, but you are the parent.

Ok, off my soapbox.  Again, these are my opinions and who knows, when I have a child, maybe my opinions will change.  Until then, that is how I feel and again, hope I did not offend.


So I found out that baseline appointments for the April IVF will be April 4 and April 6.  I will hopefully find out soon what my calendar will be for this month.  Egg retrievals will be the week of April 16 and I will probably start injections a couple of days before baseline.  I will start the Micro-dose Lupron with 2 shots per day and then add Follistim and Menopur a couple of days later.

I am so excited about this new protocol!   I just know this will be the one!  Spring is here and that means renewal!  So this NEW cycle, with the NEW protocol will work!  I am going to keep this positive attitude.  I have to!  My husband always says “you become what you think about.”  So I am not going to think this will not work.  I am going to think about being pregnant and having that baby!  So I have started imagining getting pregnant.  I have even looked a little online at some baby things.  I never did that before as I thought I might jinx it.  So this time I am doing things differently.  I am off soda!  I am drinking a lot of water.  I am really trying to eat better.  Things will be better this time.  I know it!  So if things go as planned, which they will :), we will have our miracle around New Years!  See!  New cycle, new protocol and New Years.  Sounds good to me!

Thanks for reading!


3 Responses to “question and other stuff . . .”

  1. Great attitude! I hope this is your year for a pregnancy!!! April is just around the corner and a New Years baby would be PERFECT!!!!!

  2. I know it is hard. I finally had to make an appointment for a hysterectomy…something I have fought for twenty years. In the office I had to sit in a room called the waiting WOMB it was so hard. They have pregnant women everywhere, picture boards and to add Insult to injury I got to see my “baby huge stopped counting at 17 fibroids” on a large flat screen TV. I was teary eyed…and I told the doctor about it, just so they could be more aware and maybe have a separate place for people like me.

    However as long as it is in my power I will rejoice with each life that is brought into this world. I try so,hard not to get upset….I know it is hard… Everything I dreamed of being a nurse, being a mom heck just being independent has been taken from me….but I am not less then and neither are you.

    Rejoice with those who got this blessing now, I thoroughly believe your time will come. You never know how happy people ,ay or may not be just because they didnt have trouble getting pregnant.

    Foster in yourself in your womb for my future niece or nephew a warm loving place..dream of happiness, joy, saftey…put your hands on your womb area and pray and ask,God to make your,womb productive. That is what my prayer is for you…just keep,your eyes on God..don’t look or compare yourself to have your own wonderful amazing life…different roads. It amazing.

    Praying every day for you !!!

  3. ttb2 Says:

    Keeping my fingers crossed that this new protocol is the one for you!!

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